I close my eyes to reclaim my peace. But in the darkness I come at you swinging with the force of a thousand wrongs.
Always swinging, never connecting.
I bat at you with kitten paws but you never even flinch. I kick and scream at your impenetrable walls, but you’re a fortress. I am lost.
I break the glass with banshee cries and chew the shards to sand. I taste the blood and spit it out, a bitter pool for your reflection.
I hope you drown.
I grab your hair and lick your face to mark you as my own. You belong to me I say when I Holyfield your ear.
And when I think I’ve won again, again you slip away. The light of day has won this one. It always is the same.
Enemy of my enemy, enemy mine.
In my angsty, community raised, couch surfing, teen years I wrote a lot of poetry. In lieu of a heart dotted i diary, I would sit with my Mazzy Star, The Doors or Alice In Chains and write all the wrongs of my little world. When I was done, I would smile and frolic off on my merry California way, refreshed and ready to do what teenagers do.
I miss that feeling of renewal.
I love poetry, and have mentioned how cathartic I find it. However, I seldom write it just for me anymore let alone share it. Especially since I get to read wonderful poetry everyday here on WP. But lately, in my self possessed, collected adulthood, my old outlet found me in a time of need.
So in honor of candor and stress relief I decided to share.😅😳
Self portrait in sepia pencils on canvas by me.